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Trying To Not Drink

2 Years, No Voluntary Alcohol, 1 Lucky Man

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Chillin Trying To Not Drink

Im so glad Im not drinking. Im so grateful. Im so blessed. Im so lucky.

When Im not drinking, I trust myself. Others can trust me. I may make mistakes sober but they wont be flagrant, belligerent, or overly destructive.

When Im not drinking I have more control of a beautiful Life, and I have trust of myself.

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Oetics Trying To Not Drink

The day could begin so classy, or innocently. Olives and crackers and feta cheese, a high-line party thrown by some big-wig production company.

10 hours later I could end up waking on a subway train seat, articles of mine missing. No recollection of what I’ve done, where I’ve been the last 5 hours. No idea what I have done to whom, and vice versa.

Once the first drop hits the brain, the signal all-of-a-sudden becomes “I can handle this, it’s not that bad. I am in control. I can have another”

Ten drinks later, sloppily stumbling into people and embarrassing myself on the street, incoherently speaking, looking for another place to drink, much more prone to violence…still saying the same thing, “I can handle this, it’s not that bad. I am in control. I can have another”

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Trying To Not Drink

It’s not the one drink itself I fear. It’s the thought that one drink will be alright. It wont.

The thought that everything is ok now, and one drink is achievable. This is the deceit, the step into a hole that could be a puddle or a step off a skyscraper.

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Trying To Not Drink

Bullets in a Revolver

Bullets in a Revolver

Drinking is like a

revolver, with bullets

in some, you dont know

how many bullets and you

dont know how many

chambers,

You prob get a feel for the

# of bullets + chambers based

on Karma, or your actions