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Interconnectivity Quotes Relationships

Happiness from Relationships and Minor Random Connections

By now you may have heard of many studies finding that the health of our personal human relationships is the biggest indicator of how happy we might be. In other words, the healthier our connections and relationships, the more likely we are overall satisfied with life.

There was a related finding in a recent New York Times article that I found interesting, that small, random acts of connection with strangers can help increase our happiness for the day. Here’s a few quotes:

“…conducted an experiment in which they asked people to interact with strangers on public transit — to try to have a moment of connection — and found that the commuters seemed to get a mood boost from the exercise. Epley and Schroeder’s research and other studies have found that people underestimated both how much they would enjoy the experience and how open the strangers would be to it. ‘We have this innate reluctance to socially connect, particularly with strangers — and then we’re happier when we make ourselves. I find it a really useful thing to know.'”

“What she found more surprising was just how effective even having smaller points of connection throughout the day could be for happiness — and how achievable that is, if people could only overcome their own hesitation. ‘If someone were to ask me what’s the one thing you could do tomorrow to be happier, that’s my answer: having a conversation with someone — or a deeper conversation than you normally do,’ she says. Talking to strangers — on trains, in a coffee shop, at the playground, on line at the D.M.V., in the waiting room at the doctor’s office — could be dismissed as an exercise that simply makes the time pass. But it could also be seen as a moving reflection of how eager we all are, every day, to connect with other humans whose interiority would otherwise be a mystery, individuals in whose faces we might otherwise read threat, judgment, boredom or diffidence. Talking to strangers guarantees novelty, possibly even learning. It holds the promise, each time, of unexpected insight.”

“Lyubomirsky’s own research, over many years, pointed toward the importance of a person’s mind-set: Happy people tended to refrain from comparing themselves with others, had more positive perceptions of others, found ways to be satisfied with a range of choices and did not dwell on the negative.”

“Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.
Strong, long-term relationships with spouses, family and friends built on deep trust — not achievement, not fortune or fame — were what predicted well-being.”

From the following New York Times article:

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/01/magazine/happiness-research-studies-relationships.html

 

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Chillin Hooraaaaaaaaay

Graduation Pics

While I technically graduated this past September, I finally celebrated the official graduation ceremony this past Friday, May 9, 2025. Here is a photo of myself and my advisor, Erich Dietrich, who hooded me as a Doctor of Education 🙂

Graduation regaliaFunny, before the ceremony when I was in the bathroom, it hit me: I look just like Erich! Meaning, our gowns were essentially the same. This was a realization that I am on the same degree level as him now, as well as being on the same level as my other professors. It’s a pretty amazing realization. And during the ceremony he sat next to me in the audience and walked on stage with me – again signifying this equal level of education attainment. Of course he has much more experience, research, etc., but the degree levels are the same. It really helps me understand where I am at in regards to education, position, and potential.

Here are a few other photos from May 14, 2025, the NYU celebration Grad Alley, where the streets around campus are blocked and filled with food, carnival games, music and entertainers, and other fun things to celebrate graduation. It was raining plenty but I wanted to celebrate, and celebrate I did =D

Graduation picNYU LettersNYU LettersDr. Orlando Fernandez

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Inserts Musica Relationships

A Charlie Brown Christmas Song in June

Funny how in recent weeks I’ve been singing that Charlie Brown Christmas song in my head. It’s funny because its June 5th, in NYC, and it is warm, and very probably going to get much warmer in the next two months.

As a child I had a very emotionally-split relationship with Christmas. I loved the gifts of course, and the large family get-togethers, which thank God we still continue to this day. But because my parents were not around most of the time, because I was raised by my grandparents for the better part of my young childhood, I felt a lacking; a longing. Like many Hispanic households we stayed up celebrating on Christmas Eve till the clock turned midnight, which is when we could open the gifts. Excruciating for a group of young kids just itching and wanting of those gifts 🙂 After opening all the gifts, and all the clamor and excitement, hugs kisses and laughter, yelling etc., everyone would leave our house probably after 1 or 2am. I remember being in the dark after they left, looking at a darkened tree, and feeling that void. I was happy with my gifts, but I didn’t know why I was so sad. Later I figured out that drop from the excitement to the quiet darkness was probably too much too quick for me, and so it felt like a dramatic void. But underlying I think was that I wanted to be with my parents.

Since maybe as a teenager I was not too much of a fan of the Christmas entourage. The decorations, the songs. I think I always related it to this sadness, and so I didn’t feel as joyful with everything Christmas as so many others popularly are.

Ironically, since my grandma has passed two years ago, and since I have commitment from my parents to being a healthier presence, I have enjoyed Christmas now, the whole thing. I long for it actually. The cold days where we wear snug sweaters. Cozying with family and loved ones. Seeing the joy in the kids’ faces and setting up fun things for all of us to enjoy in those special times. Now it’s the first week of June, and I am singing Charlie Brown’s Christmas song in my head, thinking of that scene where the characters are all ice skating to that harmonic melody. While I’m here on the topic, I have to plug Laurel and Hardy’s March of the Wooden Soldiers movie from like 1930’s or 1940’s. That I enjoyed in my childhood 🙂

Please enjoy here Charlie Brown’s Christmas song. By the way, the Vince Guaraldi Trio, who makes those Charlie Brown songs, are so good:

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Chillin Exponential Potential Interconnectivity Life Is Yours Using The Brain

No Matter What, Know that Things Can Get Better

No matter what, know that things can get better.

No matter where you are. Or what is going on. Regardless of the impacts of the past, the future can be very unpredictable.

No matter what we think is going to happen, or how we believe things will turn out, we don’t consciously know it all. We don’t know the details. And so often, wild, crazy things have entered into Life to be a part of reality.

Keep positive. Keep open. And definitely, please, stay real.

Keeping positive doesn’t mean denying the truth of the moment. Positivity that can spark change is about accepting the truth of the moment, being a “Yes” to it, with humility, love, connection, and optimism. Imagine the number of people who have done the worst things, and then turned their lives around. Imagine the many miracles people have experienced with seemingly no rhyme or reason, but which have been saving graces in their lives?

Keep positive my friends. Real to your self, your core, your Soul. And yet, positive. Loving. Accepting. Forgiving. Loving. Loving. Loving.

Blessings to you and yours. And all. One Love.

Categories
Quotes Using The Brain

Two Pleasure Systems in the Human Brain

we have two separate pleasure systems in our brains, one that has to do with exciting pleasure and one with satisfying pleasure. The exciting system relates to the ‘appetitive’ pleasure that we get imagining something we desire, such as sex or a good meal. Its neurochemistry is largely dopamine-related, and it raises our tension level. The second pleasure system has to do with the satisfaction, or consummatory
pleasure, that attends actually having sex or having that meal, a calming, fulfilling pleasure. Its neurochemistry is based on the release of endorphins, which are related to opiates and give a peaceful, euphoric bliss.

-Norman Doidge, from: The Brain that Changes Itself

Categories
Quotes Relationships

Healthy Power of Human Relationships

A deep and beautiful talk on the healing, fulfilling, and transformative power of authentic human connections.

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Chillin Life Is Yours

More on Meaning in Life

I love what Emily Esfahani Smith says. She is someone I can always count on, much like Brené Brown, to speak very authentically, with a powerful, conscious heart. Emily Esfahani Smith is a researcher and author. The findings that she speaks about are much of what I have noticed in my own explorations and trials and tribulations of experiencing meaning in life. I am grateful also for the interviewer who goes in rapid pace to ensure that Emily covers a lot of ground in useful depth of her knowledge in this area. I truly hope you enjoy this amazing interview.

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Chillin Interconnectivity Spark the Flame - Short Vlog

Spark the Flame Vlog 8 – Human Need for Connection

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Exponential Potential Life Is Yours Quotes

Four Pillars of a Meaningful Life

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Interconnectivity Spark the Flame - Long Podcast

Spark the Flame Podcast 19

Was having issues with the audio, so couldnt include an intro and outro this time. But will try to have it working for next time. Enjoy!

Categories
Chillin Oetics

I Broke the Egg Yolk. So What?

I was feeling good, then the egg yolk broke.

And I felt a moment of disappointment, but went back to feeling good.

It wouldn’t have mattered if the egg yolk had stayed intact, I would have still felt disappointed at something.

Then, in the same way, it would be up to me to feel better 🙂

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Chillin Free Hands Interconnectivity Using The Brain

A Charmed Life

Things are fine for you when you feel fine for you. They may come out of nowhere, and shock you, but if you hold the “this is fine”, “it is going to be ok” feeling constant, things reorder themselves to be fine for you.

charmed_Life2

If your perspective is at a general high/up/optimistic constant, Life will appear magical, because things are reordered in ways that appear crazy, to meet you on your perspective. Throughout the low times, your high perspective continues to carry you through, until Life comes seemingly out of nowhere again to meet your high perspective with a beautiful gracious blessed set of events.

Keep your perspective high, your optimism, and you invite the perception and experience of a charmed Life.

Categories
Quotes

“There is no security in your mansions or your fortresses, your family vaults or your banks or your double beds. Understand this fact, and you will be free. Accept it and you will be happy.”

-Christopher Isherwood

Categories
Life Is Yours

What I Do Matters

You are always affecting yourself, and your surroundings. Everytime you do, or dont do something, you are directly causing the results you experience.

I’m not in control of my life

You are the decision maker. Whether you like it or not, that’s the deal. All decisions about your life fall ultimately square on your shoulders.

I dont have the right to do what I want to do

Hey, this is your ilfe. Nobody else can live it for you. Not your parents, not your teachers, not your friends, not your kids. Exclusive rights to do what you want, belongs to you. Your life, your rights.

I dont deserve to be happy.

You damn skippy you deserve to be happy. Why not? Why would someone else deserve happiness, and not you? As far as we can tell, every happy person on this planet is still a human being, just like you. They are the same species as you. If they can be happy, so can you. If they have the right, so do you.

I cant change things

Of course you can. People have been changing things throughout recorded human history. People have changed things about themselves, things about others, and things about the world. Society would still be living in caves, building fires every night, if humans couldn’t change. You are the same as everyone else in that respect, you can change things.

I can only do so much

Yes, you can. And you can do even more than that. There is no limit to what you can accomplish. The only limits that exist are the ones you accept. Every “limit” has its answer, its resolution. Its antidote.